A while back, I attended a networking event and ran into a great friend. As we observed the crowds at the networking event, it stimulated a conversation between the two of us about people and leadership.
If you have not heard the story of the crabs or the concept of 'crab mentality' here is a quick recap.
When you go fishing for crabs with a bucket, it is important to bring a lid for the first crab. The reason is, they will attempt to crawl out of the bucket and will most likely succeed. Once you catch a second crab, you no longer have to keep the crab covered because the other crabs in the bucket will keep each other from crawling out.
When we are in the bucket (situation, trouble, etc...) with others, we tend to pull each other down. I then thought about the idea of helping others out of the the bucket, so I asked, why when we try to help others out of the bucket do they tend to resist so heavily?
He put his hand out and asked me to put my hand out. He began pushing on my hand and I immediately, out of instinct, pushed right back. He then put his hand out again, face up. I put my hand out, he grabbed it and began to walk away. I immediately began to follow.These were very similar actions but resulted in two completely different responses.
When we push people to move forward, we establish resistance. If instead of pushing, we choose to open up, invite others and move forward, they are more likely to willingly follow.
In your life, who are you pushing? How will you transition to pulling?